Bevan Dufty wants to bribe SF gays w/ Rhianna & Diana Ross

I’m sure Dufty would bring those stars to San Francisco to help the kids, just like he did when he dragged Britney Spears‘ lip sync side show to town last week.

As the Bay Area Reporter notes today, it took a village of gays to bring Britney to town and the effort was very worthwhile.

What was accomplished?

Spears' helping Dufty WIN!

Well, local drag queens got some attention (which required months of negotiation).

And Britney’s new album – released THIS WEEK – was promoted.

Also:  “With almost no direction, the five queens (gave an)…endorsement of Dufty’s mayoral bid.”

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!

Dufty really wanted to have Spears pay a visit to Larkin Street Youth Services and LYRIC (LGBTQ youth organization) but “Spears was unable to visit the programs…(Good Morning America) taped segments with them and recognized the organizations on air and during the Sunday performance.”

BRAVO!

Furthermore, Britney went to the new LGBT Historical center (pic from BAR) and she got to meet Scott Wiener, the neighborhood rep on the Board of Supervisors. Can this get any better!!  How do YOU spell success?

Dufty is in discussions with someone at a record company to bring more celebrity gals to town because Scott Wiener needs to meet more singers and these hard working pop stars don’t get to go to many museums.

Who should he bring to town? It’s too bad Laura Branigan is dead. Maybe he could get Ke$ha or Rebecca Black or or or CHARLENE!!

If Dufty can get Charlene to sing at the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium – and if he does a duet with her – I would endorse him with NO hesitation.

 

 

Emmett Burns says gay people aren’t beaten enough

There are some people that make the claim that gays don’t suffer enough to have earned rights in America.

Seriously.

Just a couple weeks ago a politician in Maryland, Emmett Burns, complained about comparisons being made between the civil rights struggles that consumed much of the 20th century and the ongoing laws and ballot measures that seek to legalize discrimination against LGBTQ citizens.

Burns said: “Show me your Selma, Alabama,… [the attempt to legalize same-sex marriage] violates natural law. It always denies a child either a father or a mother. It promotes the homosexual lifestyle. It turns a moral wrong into a civil right. … [If marriage equality is granted] children will be taught that the homosexual lifestyle is on par with the heterosexual lifestyle.”

Needless to say, Mr. Burns doesn’t address the ways that heterosexual people violate natural law and raise children outside of marriage – or in an extramarital arrangement (aka adultery) – nor does he have any information about what children are learning from their parent or parents (either raised by a single parent or in a blended family) that does not follow any general understanding of morality or civility.

There are no punishments or restrictions or amendments or grandiose statements being made by a bellicose blowhard like him about ANY of the numerous and multiple ways “his people” – those that follow natural law – allow rule bending and breeches of religious code.

But that’s beside the point. Burns said: “Show me your Selma”

Here is the latest surveillance footage of our Selma:

Damian Furtch is the man being pummeled in the footage shown:

The latest example of our Selma

Fuck you Emmett Burns.

Organized crime family in Ohio murders divorcing daughter

The Faith Tabernacle Church is praying for the family accused of killing Summer Inman, 25, mother of three children caught in a divorce/custody dispute with her estranged husband, William. The accused family – William A. Inman II, 26, and his parents, William A. Inman, 47, and Sandra Inman, 46 – were long term members of the Church.

"Don" of the Inman crime mob

Hopefully, the church goers are also praying for the victim, but don’t count on it. These people are from Ohio and Ohioans are famous for being jesusy goosesteppers. They can’t resist adding laws and amendments to protect the delicate and sacred institution of marriage from the gays. Religious fanatics can’t see past the end of their own nose and may have a hard time thinking about Summer Inman because of her plans to divorce herself from The Family.

Strangled the mother of his children

Summer was last seen leaving work on March 22.  Witnesses reported seeing two men force Summer Inman into a white Ford Crown Victoria outside the bank where she was works. A woman with blond hair was seen driving the car.

“The next morning, William Inman and his parents were seen on a car wash surveillance video appearing to vacuum and make alterations to a white Crown Victoria.”

Bloody Mama

The body of the mother of three children was found in the septic system of the Faith Tabernacle Church on March 30. She appeared to have been strangled – a plastic tie was found around her neck.

Summer’s husband had “threatened to kill” her if she ever “took the children from him.” She also said her husband would take her car keys, wallet and cell phone to leave her “captive” in their own home, the station reports.

Ohio: defending the tradition of one man/one woman marriage and ganging up to kill anyone that gets in the way.

I’m sure Jesus is sitting on a cloud somewhere smiling down on the lovely people of Ohio.

CRISIS: JUDY JUDY IN HOSPITAL

Judge Judith Sheindlin was carted by ambulance to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center with an “undisclosed condition” today. “ She was admitted in serious condition.”

My higher power

When I read this at SF Gate my heart sank, and then I vomited and  lost continence.

But then I saw the part that says she is feeling ”much better” and expects to be back at the taping of her show on April 12 as scheduled.

Judge Judy is 68 years old and is not spitting up blood or about to have a leg amputated nor is she allowed to join Elizabeth Taylor or Farley Granger in the afterlife yet.

Michigan girl (13) impregnated by brother (16)

Today must be heterosexual incest day.  I’ll have to check my calendar when I get home.

We don’t know for sure if the father of the stillborn baby of a 13 yr old girl from Detroit, Michigan was her brother…but we do know that they are “…living at the same address and sharing the same last name.” 

On the case!

To me, that sounds like they might be brother and sister, but I’m no Jessica Fletcher. I could be wrong.

The rest of the story you can pretty much guess.  There was an “incident” last summer between the two and the girl hasn’t been feeling well lately and when it was discovered upon closer examination that she had already given birth the cops were called.

At the ungawdly hour of 5:30am on a Sunday (why then?) the body of the stillborn baby (that could have been at work saving Social Securty) was found in the attic of a house where the girl was staying.

Pardon me, but I thought same-sex marriage was supposed to lead to incest and alcoholism and diptheria and club feet…sounds to me like good ol’ fashioned American heterosexuality is figuring out how keep relatives fucking each other.

Heterosexuality sounds intrinsically disordered.  Someone better call the Pope!

Tim Tebow’s balls will be cooler in Jockey underpants

The Sun Sentinel has a sneak preview of the ad featuring Christian virgin football player Tim Tebow.

According to the Sun Sentinel: “Jockey is the first U.S. company to offer underwear treated with Outlast technology with the launch of Jockey staycool.” Just the kind of fabric a jock needs around his nards.

Timmy Te-boner

This technology was originally developed for NASA.  The fabric helps absorb, store and release heat in order to “maintain optimal skin temperature.”

Heat seaking and releasing technology comes in very handy to young virile men that never – EVER – ejaculate because that would be wasteful and ungawdlike. Only the devil and his followers allow semen to discharge willy-nilly.

Timmy is saving his man juice for his future wife who will probably drown. She will undoubtedly end up in heaven, though.

(Big thanks to my Twitter pal queengasoline aka AnastasiaBeaverhausn for the tip!)

12 yr old Dutch girl births her sister/daughter

Possibly.

No one has been charged with anything yet. But a 12 year old girl on a school field trip had bad stomach pains that turned out to be labor pains.

Her sister / her daughter

Someone fathered that baby….and I don’t want to draw any conclusions but this is an interesting revelation:  “…the largest daily morning paper in the Netherlands, reports that the 52-year-old father of the girl was previously convicted of sexually abusing a child in a previous marriage.”

Anything can happen, right?  It’s not necessarily her father’s child. Is it?

Aren’t these the kinds of things that LGBTQ people are accused of doing?

Why is it that all the times heterosexuals – especially MALE heterosexuals – engage in this kind of perversion there isn’t a barrage of Christian beed squeezers pissing their pants about stripping rights and amending constitutions and passing laws forbidding straight men from having jobs?

Why is that?

By the way:  This friday the Netherlands celebrates TEN YEARS of recognizing same-sex marriage and the heterosexuals have yet to stop raping their own children.  See – there’s nothing to worry about.

Heartbreak: Fecal fury in Staten Island!

A Staten Island man refused to allow his girlfriend to ditch him and their traditional (aka man/woman) love without a fight.

He couldn’t stop her from breaking up with him, but he wanted to make sure she remembered all good times they had before saying one final goodbye. She’ll regret dumping Rasheen Harrison. She will miss the good love they had.

If he has to burn down her apartment building to make the point, then so be it!

Firey fecal fury!

Of course the gal is six months pregnant with his child and she has two other children (because that’s how the sacred institution of heterosexual procreation is handled in this traditional nation of ours), but that’s not the point.  The point is, as Rasheen Harrison put it: “I’m the devil!”

Before the fire drama started he made an artistic statement.

Harrison showed up at his ex-girlfriend’s apartment at 5:30am and, after defecating in the elevator, smeared his newborn feces on her apartment door. Then he stripped off his clothes and set the door on fire. When the police arrived, Harrison was standing naked in the hallway covered in poop.

That’ll learn her!

Gandhi loves pussy!

Half the world is foaming in resentment over an interpretation of a book that claims Mahatma Gandhi – the Father of India – had a homosexual relationship. *Gasp*

A state in Western India has banned the book according to CBS News.

Wishes he saw Glee

The book, “Great Soul: Mahatma Gandhi and His Struggle With India” by Joseph Lelyveld has not even been released in India yet but early reviews have focused on a relationship between Gandhi and a German dude named Hermann Kallenbach. I think the English translation of Kallenbach is “cornhole”, but I can’t find my German translation dictionary right now.

The evidence of this man-on-man wiener action that is offensive and defamatory and vile and an offense to all vagina worshipers in the world:

“Writing in the Wall Street Journal, Andrew Roberts said that the only portrait on the mantelpiece opposite Gandhi’s bed was of Kallenbach. ‘How completely you have taken possession of my body,’ reads one widely quoted letter from Gandhi to Kallenbach. ‘This is slavery with a vengeance.’“

Isn’t that scandalous and erotic??  I bet the cover of this book has an image of Gandhi running down a steep, treacherous hill, looking back in terror at a dark, Victorian mansion that has one window illuminated – highlighting a menacing (Germanic) silhouette!

Gandhi's fave?

Mahatma may have – as documented in publicly available correspondence – been possessed (even temporarily) by a German named Hermann but let’s not focus on this as a lapse from greatness. That might be too much to consider. What would it mean if we interpret Gandhi’s “slavery with a vengeance” remark to mean he is hooked on the taste of braunschweiger?

Oh no!!  First Abe Lincoln is a fudge packer and now Mahatma Gandhi was light in his sandals – even if it was with one man….and only for a little while!?!!

Can’t we just remember our historical / political figures obsessed with boobs and girls and labia? You know….like they sit around all day long doodling sketches of pretty girls on note pads when they are brainstorming important world changing ideas…can’t we have our men untainted by embarrassing moments of male bonding and penis tasting and mustache rubbing?

That’s just so icky.  Isn’t it much more appealing to think of them horning off over girls?  THAT is much more respectable and historically sound…and it leaves the anuses of our founders intact and pure. What could be more important?

BREAKING: Zsa Zsa spits up blood

It’s back to the hospital for the Hungarian gal that will outlive us all.

Gabor's reaction to the death of Granger

Zsa Zsa Gabor’s husband, “Prince Frederic von Anhalt said his 93-year-old wife was taken to Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center after she spit up blood…” This news comes out after reports of a hospitalization of Ms. Gabor last week.

But contrary to those reports, Zsa Zsa was not admitted to the hospital after the death of Elizabeth Taylor.  A spokesman for Zsa Zsa’s daughter says that Ms. Gabor had no idea that Ms. Taylor had died.

Apparently she is taking the news of the death of Farley Granger quite hard. When she heard he was dead she spewed blood like Gene Simmons does during the song “God of Thunder.”