Gandhi loves pussy!

March 30, 2011 § 2 Comments

Half the world is foaming in resentment over an interpretation of a book that claims Mahatma Gandhi – the Father of India – had a homosexual relationship. *Gasp*

A state in Western India has banned the book according to CBS News.

Gandhi

Wishes he saw Glee

The book, “Great Soul: Mahatma Gandhi and His Struggle With India” by Joseph Lelyveld has not even been released in India yet but early reviews have focused on a relationship between Gandhi and a German dude named Hermann Kallenbach. I think the English translation of Kallenbach is “cornhole”, but I can’t find my German translation dictionary right now.

The evidence of this man-on-man wiener action that is offensive and defamatory and vile and an offense to all vagina worshipers in the world:

Writing in the Wall Street Journal, Andrew Roberts said that the only portrait on the mantelpiece opposite Gandhi’s bed was of Kallenbach. ‘How completely you have taken possession of my body,’ reads one widely quoted letter from Gandhi to Kallenbach. ‘This is slavery with a vengeance.’

Isn’t that scandalous and erotic??  I bet the cover of this book has an image of Gandhi running down a steep, treacherous hill, looking back in terror at a dark, Victorian mansion that has one window illuminated – highlighting a menacing (Germanic) silhouette!

Sausage

Gandhi's fave?

Mahatma may have – as documented in publicly available correspondence – been possessed (even temporarily) by a German named Hermann but let’s not focus on this as a lapse from greatness. That might be too much to consider. What would it mean if we interpret Gandhi’s “slavery with a vengeance” remark to mean he is hooked on the taste of braunschweiger?

Oh no!!  First Abe Lincoln is a fudge packer and now Mahatma Gandhi was light in his sandals – even if it was with one man….and only for a little while!?!!

Can’t we just remember our historical / political figures obsessed with boobs and girls and labia? You know….like they sit around all day long doodling sketches of pretty girls on note pads when they are brainstorming important world changing ideas…can’t we have our men untainted by embarrassing moments of male bonding and penis tasting and mustache rubbing?

That’s just so icky.  Isn’t it much more appealing to think of them horning off over girls?  THAT is much more respectable and historically sound…and it leaves the anuses of our founders intact and pure. What could be more important?

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